It's a damn shame...

It was one of those rare occasions that my brother and I get to talk to my mom at the dinner table. After we were done eating, we pretty much just talked about how our lives were going since we barely talk to our own mother OTL

My mom's a nurse so usually at times like that, she'd bust out something interesting. She said that yesterday, she had a case where a 21 year old girl committed suicide. And her story behind it..was really..sad? I don't know what to feel for that girl.

The girl was dating this guy since they were 15. They were on the phone and the guy pretty much called their relationship quits after 6 years. They were arguing a few and the girl threatens that she will kill herself. Before her boyfriend got a chance to say anything against that, the phone line died. Worried, the guy quickly rushes over to her house pounding on the door, but no answer. He calls her parents, who were out having dinner, and explained to them the situation. They got home in around 20 minutes and when they got in, they found she hanged herself in the garage.

It was really sad because my mom said that the girl had a 10 year old brother who saw her hanging there. It must have been really traumatizing for the kid. If I were him, I probably would've cried and screamed my head off. But once they got to the hospital, they tried reviving her. They got a heartbeat, but no brain activity so she was pretty much a goner.

I just..don't know who's to blame. I felt rather bad for her boyfriend who just sat there shaking, crying, and feeling guilty. But then I felt bad for the girl too. Although, it was a rather selfish thing to do. I mean, the two of them were practically dating for 6 years, you can't blame the boyfriend for wanting to move on. My mom said she even tried to get him back by saying that she was pregnant so that he wouldn't leave her. However, when they tested that at the hospital, it proved negative. That whole pregnant thing is always a pathetic last ditch effort though. All she was thinking about at the time was herself and her own feelings. I felt really bad for her family as well. I mean, her mother couldn't even look at her in the garage and she had a close relationship with her little brother too. It's such a damn shame, y'know?

My mom also said that the girl's mom was concerned for both my brother and I since we're both still at that age. I've had times where I was really depressed for long periods and just wanted to end it. But I never actually went through with anything though. Instead I'd just sit there and cry like a loser, hoping for a better tomorrow. I know I'm still young and have a lot ahead of me. Before I used to think I wasn't gonna live past my early 20s because I couldn't see myself anywhere. But now, I think I have a more positive view on life. Or at least I've been doing a lot better than before. My last three years of high school I mostly wasted on being a little emo-butthurt-faggot and screwing myself over. Right now, I have my moments, but who doesn't? I've been feeling a lot better about myself.

I'LL GIVE MY MEANINGLESS LIFE SOME MEANIIIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGGGG~ *brick'd*